Yours forever, even in hurt...

Mine,

No longer mine. I stand here drenched in pouring torrents of pain. Unsure of what to say next. My hollow chest from where my heart used to reside echoes the drops of burning pain. Applying salt to my open wound. Knowing that you are no longer mine and feeling the sting of every tear that I cannot allow to fall. You were my life even if I dod not show it and you did know it. You are everything I ever wanted in every songle aspect and true to my nature I found a way to mess it up. The messed up part is I still remain yours in my mind. My heart is empty since you moved out, my heart died.

My mind is playing tricks on me. Seeing you in my dreams, hearing your voice in my dreams, hearing your voice even when I am awake but when I look you are not there. The madness of heartache is damaging. You haunt me deep in my heart, the echo of your last words remain bouncing off the wall of the cave that used to be my heart. I don't know how to say this. You were everything to me and I....

I do not wish you hurt in any aspect of my life so I shall let you go. I pray you are well and pray a thought of me may cross your mind from time to time.

Because even in this unimaginable hurt,

I remain,

always yours.

Goodbye dear heart....Rest.

"for out of it was though taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return...." Genesis 3:19 KJV

 Deep back into the earth you go,
system of my destruction,
agent of my pain
You felt and you hurt,
You loved and yet you were killed.
I stand over you,unable to shed a tear for what you were,
for with as much love and joy you gave,
the same amount of pain you delivered,
So I cannot cry for you,
that has died with you...
I throw your black rose into the ground,
with your own dust
From the dust you came,
dust you brought,
dust you return.
Rest in peace dear heart...

But above all...
Rest.

My Uncomfortable Heart

"...waking up is hard to do, sleep is impossible too..." Better that we Break-Maroon 5

You were everything to me. My whole heart and happiness depended on you. It is my fault we're through. I can't feel anything but pain. My pain continues with every single beat my heart takes. It seems that with every beat, more pain courses through my body. I feel the pain deep inside me...deeper than anything I have ever felt. My sadness emanates in every pore of my being. I sit here...trying to think straight. It gets harder each day to think that there are things I will never get to share with you. Your name fully inscribed on my heart now leaves me with a heart with crosses. You are everywhere I seem to go, I see you in all that I do.

I didn't know how deeply in love I was with you until you took your love from me and left me reeling from the shock of it all. Unable to smile, to laugh truly, to do anything but think of what could have been, what is happening now...God my heart breaks with each sigh... One more breath taken without you here, one more blink without you to focus on. We long for things that are gone and as such I long so deeply for your warmth, laugh, your smile, your hair in my face when we sleep, your kiss, your love.... I long for you and the pain hit me again when I realise that you are not here. You are no longer here...my heart is uncomfortable...my pain has no end....